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Do you know your real life goals? What does your ideal life look like?
Doing some thorough introspection is an absolute must before you begin creating your dream life. You’ve got to know where you’re going before you take off!
I’ve broken this post up into different areas of life to set goals in:
- Home & Family
- Romantic Relationships
- Purpose & Spirituality
- Experiences & Achievements
Let’s take a look at some questions you can ask yourself to help you figure out what you really want your life to look like.
Home & Family Life Goals
- What do I want my morning routine to look like? What about an evening routine?
- How much time each day do I want to spend at home?
- Do I prefer open living spaces, or more confined spaces?
- What colors make me feel most inspired / comfortable / at home?
- What types of interior design do I want in my home?
- Do I want my home to be conveniently located near any particular type(s) of places? (E.g. shopping centers, the downtown district, nature walks, etc.)
- Do I want to live near beaches? Mountains? A city center?
- What sort of pets do I want to have, if any? What sort of home will best suit my pets?
- Do I want (more) kids? If so, how many?
- Do I want to adopt or foster children?
- What kind of parent do I want to be?
- Is it important for me to live near other family?
- How do I want to primarily get around? In a car? Bike? Public transportation?
- Is it important to me to have an eco-friendly or sustainable home?
- Would I rather own or rent my home?
- Do I want a home with a yard? A porch? A deck? A pool?
- Would I prefer to have roommates, a live-in partner (or partners), or to live alone?
- Do I want to settle into one home for the rest of my life, or would I prefer the freedom of moving around?
- Is it a life goal of mine to live abroad? If so, where and for how long?
Friendship Life Goals
- Am I more introverted, or extroverted?
- What traits are important to me in a friend?
- Do I prefer hanging out in groups, or am I more of a one-on-one kind of person?
- What sorts of activities do I want to do with friends?
- Do I want to be the kind of friend who hosts gatherings at my home?
- Is it important that my friends share my religious/political/social views?
- Are there particular interests or activities that I would like to join a community for?
- How often do I want to hang out with friends in person?
- How often do I want to interact with friends online?
- What do I consider the ideal amount of close friends?
- What sort of friend do I want to be to other people?
Relationship Life Goals
- What am I looking for in my romantic partner(s)?
- Are there any specific roles that I want to fulfill in my romantic relationship(s)? (E.g. “the breadwinner”, “the house-spouse”)
- Do I have a preference for monogamy, or non-monogamy?
- Do I ever want to get married? If so, do I have a particular age range when I’d like to prioritize finding a spouse?
- At what point in a relationship would I be comfortable having sex? (E.g. immediately, after a certain amount of time, after marriage, never, etc.)
- Do I want to live with my partner(s)?
- Am I looking for a co-parent (or co-parents)?
- What sorts of activities do I want to do with my partner(s)?
- Is it important that my partner(s) have a particular level of education?
- Is it important that my partner(s) follow a particular career path?
- Do I want/need to attend therapy with my partner(s)?
- What kind of partner do I want to be?
- What is my primary love language? Would I prefer my partner(s) to have a particular love language?
- Would I prefer to have joint finances with my partner(s) or do I want to keep my finances independent?
- Do I want to be the financial provider for my partner(s)? Would I prefer that my partner(s) provide for me financially?
- Is it important that my partner(s) share my religious/political/social views?
- Am I comfortable with long distance relationships?
- Would I move to another city/state/country for my partner(s)?
- Is it important that my family/friends approve of my partner(s)?
Life Goals About Purpose (& Spirituality)
- Is it important to me to attend weekly faith services?
- How often, if at all, do I want to pray and/or meditate?
- What kind of person do I want to be? (I.e. What are my personal values?)
- How do I want people to feel when they’re around me?
- What causes am I passionate about and how can I get involved?
- Is it important to me to feel like my career has a deeper purpose?
- Do I want to be involved in a local faith/spiritual community?
- Is it important to me to study a particular type of spirituality or religion? If so, which one(s)?
- Are there any spiritual or religious rituals or practices I want to take part in? If so, which one(s) and how often?
- Do I have a sense of a particular purpose for my life (e.g. helping others, enjoying life, achieving something, etc.)? If so, what is it? If not, do I want one?
Health Life Goals
- Do I want/need to see a therapist/counselor?
- Is it a priority for me to have an exercise routine?
- What type of exercise would I most enjoy / benefit from?
- Is it important to me to go to a gym? Or to work with a personal trainer? If so, how often?
- Is there a particular type of diet that leaves me feeling my best?
- Are there any surgeries or other medical procedures that I need/want?
- How much sleep do I need every night?
- What does real self care look like for me?
Educational Life Goals
- Is college important to me?
- Do I want/need a particular degree?
- Am I interested in pursuing further education? If so, what kind?
- What are my educational areas of interest? (E.g. chemistry, psychology, foreign language, math, etc.)
- Do I want to become an expert on any particular topic(s)? If so, which one(s)?
- Do I want to become fluent in any particular language(s)? If so, which one(s)?
- What resources are available to me to attain the education that I want? (Libraries, universities, tutors, online courses, etc.)
- Am I eligible for any scholarships?
- Would I benefit from being in a study group?
- Am I a visual learner? Auditory? Hands-on?
- Am I interested in studying abroad? If so, where?
Career Life Goals
- What do I feel best when doing?
- Does the career I want require education that I’m not willing or able to pursue?
- What salary will I need in order to afford my other life goals?
- Do I work best with a team, or independently?
- What type of work environment would I thrive in?
- What do I want my relationships with coworkers to look like? (I.e. casual and friendly, strictly professional, etc.)
- Is it important to me to be my own boss?
- What sort of work schedule do I want to have?
- Do I prefer indoor or outdoor work?
- Is it important to me to feel like my work has a positive impact on the world?
- Do I want to settle into one particular field of work, or do I want to explore different career paths throughout my life?
- Would I rather work remotely, or on location?
- Do I want to work with numbers and statistics? Words? Or do I prefer work that is more hands-on?
- Do I want to attain a position of leadership at my job, or am I content to follow the instruction of others?
- How do I want to approach working with customers/clients?
- Am I good at multi-tasking? Do I want to balance different types of work at the same time?
- When do I want to retire? How much money will I need to support myself after retirement?
Experience & Achievement Life Goals
We’ve covered the biggest areas of life to set goals in.
Now it’s time to assemble a “bucket list”!
What life experiences or achievements would you regret not having at the end of your life?
Here are some more questions you can ask to help you create your ideal life:
- Is it important for me to be well-read? If so, how many books a year would I consider being “well-read”?
- Do I want to travel? Where to? Do I want to just check out tourist spots or dive deeper into the local culture?
- Am I a daredevil? Do I want to go skydiving? Bungee-jumping? Rock climbing?
- What skills do I want to learn? What hobbies do I want to pick up? (Artistic, athletic, academic, etc.)
- Do I want to work on creative projects? If so, what kind? And do I want to share my creations with others, or are they just for me?
- Do I want to have the experience of performing? If so, in what capacity? (E.g. singing karaoke, joining a drama club, being in a dance group, performing at a particular venue, etc.)
Those are just a few experiences and achievements you might want to have. For more, check out this bucket list blog full of over a thousand bucket list ideas!
Prioritizing Life Goals
Now that you’ve considered your real life goals, you can evaluate which ones might take priority over others when creating your dream life.
Ask yourself: Are some of my ideal life goals incompatible with each other?
Do your current career goals not afford you the finances you’ll need in order to live where you want?
If so, you might need to reassess the type of job you’re looking for, or consider a different city or type of home to live in.
Does your goal of having kids not align with your goal of traveling the world?
If so, maybe you can prioritize getting the travel bug out of your system before you settle down and start a family.
Are there any goals you are willing to compromise on if they are incompatible with the life goals of your family, friends, or partner(s)?
We can’t always get what we want.
Whether some of your life goals may rank over other ones is an important thing to consider when you create your ideal life.
Know When to Move On
If your ideal life isn’t your ideal life anymore… move on! Reassess, go over some of these questions again, and find new goals.
As someone with ADHD, my concept of my ideal life has shifted many times over the years.
Whether or not you’re as prone to change as I am, it’s entirely possible that you may lose passion for some of your life goals and end up latching on to new ones.
When it comes to creating your dream life, you don’t owe consistency to anyone.
Of course, if you’re flipping back and forth over what you think you want in life, it may pass you by, and you could end up not following any of your dreams!
At some point, dedication has to come before passion. Only you can decide where that line is for you.
It’s About the Journey
Assess your real life goals, and revisit them as often as necessary. But don’t forget to live in the meantime!
It’s widely recognized that taking an “I’ll be happy when…” approach to life leads to misery.
Enjoy the process! Those “a-ha!” moments when you realize your passion for a particular life goal. The joy that comes from taking a significant step towards your ideal life.
Working towards your life goals is important. But more so is the ability to enjoy those precious moments along the way.
I wish you a lovely life, full of success in your goals – and much, much beauty in the journey.
Thirsty for more introspection? Check out this post for 5 simple tips on how to get to know yourself better!
After assessing your life goals, you might find yourself starting a variety of new things. Here’s how to stick with it.
Can you think of any more questions to ask yourself when considering your real life goals? Drop ’em in the comments below! ⬇️⬇️⬇️